As I'd said in earlier posts, Liz is becoming more and more aware of her size and the comments that people make about it. In fact, it's becoming a daily conversation.
One morning, she was eating breakfast and said to me: "Mommy, you grow while you sleep, right? Did I grow? Measure me."
When Brian dropped Liz off from preschool one day, a little girl was standing there and said: "Liz just needs to eat a lot and fill her stomach up and then she'll grow."
What's interesting about these comments is that probably 80 to 90% of parents try to convince their children to go to bed on time or eat their vegetables with the promise that if they do, "they'll grow healthily and get taller."
These are pretty standard comments that many parents make and don't think much about. In fact, if Liz didn't have achondroplasia, I probably would have said the same thing probably dozens of times.
So, now we're faced with the challenge of explaining to Liz, whose only 3, that yes it's important to get a good night's sleep and yes, you want to eat healthy foods for a variety of reasons.
Those are all good things to do but you will always be a little person.
That's hard for a 3-year-old to understand. She's also under the impression that being tall is somehow better than being short.
She's really picked up on a lot concerning how our society approaches tall and short people and that's pretty surprising at this age.
Meanwhile, I'm pulling all of the tricks out my hat trying to tell her all of the best reasons for being short. She still says: "But I want to be big."
That's still hard for me to hear, but we realize that it's very important for Liz to be "comfortable in her skin" and that journey is starting now.
So, while it might be easier to just let her cry, that's not the right answer. She needs to know that her view of the world will be unique and that there are many different things she can do as a little person that those of us average-height folks could never do.
Another year flying past
2 months ago
3 comments:
I am identifying with your dilemna of explaining things in an empowering way to a 3-year-old! We, too, have been dealing with how to explain the concept of adoption and how families are all different, etc. I keep telling myself that if I handle the questions positively/proactively that it will create a stronger child! (that's on my good days!)
Carrie, you're right. I can't imagine trying to teach Liz about adoption. I guess it's hard for adults to understand some of these issues...let alone 3-year-olds. : )
Why must you always make me tear up? I think Liz touches my family so much because we can see Owen exacly where she is in a few years. You always seem to handle the situations with grace. Liz will be just fine!
Thanks for sharing,
Cat
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